I wasn’t planning on writing anything anytime soon but here I am anyway. Sex and politics on the mind. Sex because it’s always there and politics because tomorrow is finally Election Day. They do make strange bed fellows. I’ve been wondering lately why the women in my life have always been obsessed with putting me in a box. No; they haven’t tried to kill me. I mean they’re always trying to assess my way of thinking in order to get a better understanding of me. That’s cute in a way but more oft than not they get that assessment wrong.

They think I’m one way when I’m in fact the opposite or a combination of several other ways. I guess I am to blame for this since I truly despise talking about myself or my feelings. I prefer to remain jovial, crass, sophomoric and any number of things as long as it does not have anything to do with talking about me.

I don’t see myself as intriguing but I guess not talking about myself allows me to come across in that manner.

The way I see it, if I spend time talking about my feelings I may as well cut off my manhood. Women spend time talking about their feelings, not men. I don’t hang with dudes that always talk about themselves or their feelings. I’ll listen to a woman all day because she has a vagina and I may want to snuggle in it one day. That’s the non verbal agreement I have in my head. You talk; I listen and one day I’ll give you something to talk about.

I don’t plan on having you strap up and penetrate me so I’ll keep my feelings and conversations about myself to a minimum.

I told a friend of mine that the male/female relationship is typically about sex at the end of the day and I was quite happy when her friend said she thought it to be the same but she used it to her advantage more oft than not. It used to annoy her but she has now come to embrace it and has no problem navigating the tricky waters. I almost fell in love with her friend at that point but then I didn’t want to resort to a game of real life chess.

I ramble.

My feelings will forever be mine and I don’t want to ever become predictable in a woman’s eyes so I will always leave them guessing whether it’s to my detriment or theirs.

The drink of choice today is Heineken Dark Lager.

Thank God It’s Five, TGIFive.


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